It was on a Friday evening, when my father returned from one of his frequent trips across Africa and asked mother if they could spend a romantic weekend together, my mother, rarely seeing my father, enthusiastically agreed. It had been a few days later, when my parents agreed on a date. Following this arrangement my mother asked one of the neighbours if they could care for me in their absence. The neighbours, being a Christian family, agreed without hesitation. A week later the date my parents had agreed arrived and my mother escorted me to the neighbour’s house, leaving me in their care.
It was on a Thursday afternoon my parents took their leave to enjoy their well deserved romantic weekend. Friday came and Sunday dawned, and the weekend was over. It was then we remained watching the twilight of the evening sun, waiting for my parents’ return, but the night broke and my parents were nowhere to be seen. It had been two weeks following my parents’ departure, when the neighbours heard on the evening news, Isaac Ngabo, Margret Nakawala and several others had perished on a road accident. Without realising what had transpired, I carried on living my meaningless life, head full of questions, longing for their return.
It was years later I learnt what had happened. In the walk of time however, I didn’t know what to do, let alone find a path to the future I desired. Like any youngster in my situation, the first few weeks without my parents did not make sense, thus, I ran away from the neighbour’s house in search of my parents and for several days and nights, I went without food nor shelter. I became destitute and desperate, until one day I said to myself, “enough is enough!”
Like the prodigal son, I found the courage to return home, and home I found love and peace. In the interim of time, as the years went by, I realised, I could not change my past, but I could change my future, so, I decided to forgive myself for the past I could not change and forge a way to the future I could control.
I knew then, had I remained married to my orthodox, had I continued to blame my past and circumstances, had I never let go, I would have spent the rest of my life envying the success other people had achieved. In the years to come, I learnt that life is but life, you deal with as come not as goes. I knew then, you don’t solve your problems looking backward, you resolve them looking forward towards the future you envision. I understood, to thrive one must survive, and so, I learnt how to survive.
It was here I concluded, life is not a puzzle you solve but a question you ask: when the time comes and death approaches, who will remember you? What will they remember you for? It was through these questions I asked that I became aware of the things that needed to change in order to realise the life I had envisioned.
